Advice

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Good page!

Someone suggested to me a few weeks ago to add photos. I thought about it and it makes sense, personally I think adding in visuals really helps the reader become more invested in the piece of literature. Having concrete visuals helps the reader relate to certain things that you’re talking about. For example, you could add in a chart. Maybe across your time researching for your page you might’ve come across a graph showcasing the disparities in parental leave between different countries? I might also suggest altering your first few sentences under the “Parental Leave” section. In your first few sentences you have “parental leave”. Maybe adding in a filler sentence in between or altering the words around might help, from my understanding you don’t typically want to have a repetitive word structure. In the first paragraph as well, 7 sentences down, the “Parental leave” is capitalized mid-sentence. I might be wrong, but I think that should be a lowercase p. These are just some minor fixes, hope they help!

LiamMahara (talk)05:26, 16 March 2019