Talk:GRSJ224/Differences in Parental Leave During Pregnancy

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Advice005:26, 16 March 2019
Quick Suggestions 003:47, 2 March 2019

Good page!

Someone suggested to me a few weeks ago to add photos. I thought about it and it makes sense, personally I think adding in visuals really helps the reader become more invested in the piece of literature. Having concrete visuals helps the reader relate to certain things that you’re talking about. For example, you could add in a chart. Maybe across your time researching for your page you might’ve come across a graph showcasing the disparities in parental leave between different countries? I might also suggest altering your first few sentences under the “Parental Leave” section. In your first few sentences you have “parental leave”. Maybe adding in a filler sentence in between or altering the words around might help, from my understanding you don’t typically want to have a repetitive word structure. In the first paragraph as well, 7 sentences down, the “Parental leave” is capitalized mid-sentence. I might be wrong, but I think that should be a lowercase p. These are just some minor fixes, hope they help!

LiamMahara (talk)05:26, 16 March 2019

Quick Suggestions

Hi there,

Just had a look through your wiki. First, I wanted to commend you on your topic selection! I think it was a very important and creative topic that will always be relevant in our society.

I have a couple of quick suggestions for you:

- At the start of your piece you mentioned how paternity leave is "becoming more common." It might be great to add some details about how this has changed in history over the years. Why is it becoming more common? What has changed about gender roles and the world we live in that makes it more likely for men to stay home after childbirth.

- Under the topic of Parental Leave, I found the definition and the statistics getting a bit mixed together. Perhaps subheadings under ‘Paternity Leave’ (ie. Definition, Statistics) might be helpful.

-Your page is full of fantastic information! Maybe add an eye catching visual to complete it.

I really loved how under the topic of 'Family' you included the specific example of The Norwegian Reform and the study of postpartum depression in France! It shows how thoughtful you were while researching this topic.

I also really appreciated how you linked the OECD Family Database. I think it helps put your topic into perspective for readers who might find themselves in situations where they have to consider paternity leave.

I enjoyed reading about your topic! I am hopeful that in the future there will be less of a gender difference in this super important issue. Great work.

ChanelleLeBlanc (talk)03:47, 2 March 2019