Talk:He for She

I just want to raise a slight concern that your post contains a lot of bias written in it, or at least one that is not fully flushed out or supported by other arguments. Particularly where you write “Part of what makes HeForShe appealing to everyone is the lack of aggression the campaign promotes. Lately, other feminist campaigns target males as the enemy if they treat women like the stereotypical lady-like figures they were brought up to appear.” This seems to be a pretty normative statement and while I would be the last person to say that there is an objective way to say things, this reads a little too much like an anecdotal comment. It also perpetuates dangerous assumptions of "aggression" in feminist campaigns, which is itself something He for She looks to undo. As well “ so far it is safe to say that this campaign has the potential to reach new heights that the UN will live to be incredibly proud of” contains within it a few too many colloquialisms, such as “safe to say” “live to be incredibly proud of”.

I would encourage you to read again for tone and for bias while writing on something such as the He for She campaign, and I would maybe suggest a critical segment in which you look at what some of the critiques have been around the He for She campaign (not the least of which is the accusations of white feminism as well as the gender binary being reinforced).

Hi Maurice,

I think you've done an excellent job with this page. It's very informative and nothing is superfluous. The only thing I might suggest is rather infinitesimal, however, it might be helpful to provide a link to the actual heforshe website. http://www.heforshe.org/

This might be a good place for those interested in the movement to go and find out more information provided directly from the source.

-Maddie

Hi Maurice, I'm so glad someone decided to do this as their wiki page, it's a very interesting topic right now. Consider adding more hyperlinks and references as at the moment, there is only 5 references and for such a big page, this does not suffice.

I added a references page to your wiki and added the correct references with it.

Also I would advise you to fix the broken link that you have I didn't know what it was supposed to be so I can't help you with that. I think maybe you should talk about the he for she campaign page such as the take action page. As of today, 193,885 men are taking a stand for equality. It also shows u specifically the different countries

Great wiki page! I love that you chose such a relevant topic, I just saw some #heforshe pictures on instagram and was wondering what it was about!

There are a few suggestions I wanted to make: There are a couple sentences in your page where I was unsure if you were directly quoting some one or if it was something you had paraphrased. For instance the sentance “ Watson seeks to create a world where both boys and girls are comfortable being strong or fragile and are not going to be confined by their gender stereotypes” If this is a direct quote I suggest that you use quotation marks, and if it is something that has been paraphrased make sure you add a citation. You should also try and add a “References” section and cite all of the references you used in creating your page (this is such an interesting topic, I would love to take a look at the articles and websites you are referring to!)

I also noticed that you use the same phrase “gender equality is not simply a women's rights issue, but a human rights issue” in your introduction as well as in the second paragraph of the “Joining a Movement” section, it is a great expression, but I think it takes away from its powerful meaning when it is repeated. You may want to try rewording the phrase in one of your sections.

Overall I think you’ve done a great job! If you need clarification on any of the suggestions Ive made please feel free to ask:) Thank you for the informative post. Maya Sandiford