Small suggestions

Edited again - thoughts? I'm definitely more comfortable in either a paper-writing tone or a casual blog writing tone. (or a creative writing tone). I think I'm too opinionated for the wiki style! (although at least I don't have vendetta against 'comprised of' http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/feb/05/why-wikipedias-grammar-vigilante-is-wrong)

Sorry for the delay in getting back to you. I really like your edits. I think it reads much more clear whose opinion is being expressed. Great job!

Also, thanks for the link! Wow, what an odd hobby that guy has.