Talk:GRSJ224/Intersectionalfeminism

This wiki page focusses on intersectionality and its impact on females. It gives a broad and a detailed explanation of the term intersectionality and its relationship with feminism. It is true as the wiki page states that black women are more discriminated than white women. The rationale is that black women who by any chance turn out to be bisexual, face more prejudice since they are judged base on their skin color and sexual orientation. The page gives an excellent history of the word intersectionality but fails to state the year when this term was coined. How is intersectionality applied in everyday lives? Besides, the wage gap between male and female is demonstrated, but there is no evidence to back such claims.

The wiki page is well written free of grammatical and spelling errors. It contains functional links. Also, words are appropriately spaced as there is no overlap in the essay. Moreover, it has a reference list, but the same is not reflected in the wiki content. As expected, this article should have a well-developed table of contents bearing the various subtopic under discussion. Also, the page should have employed the use of images, graphs or pie-charts in presenting its point. The author states that we should not concentrate on the raising the women’s pay and forget other aspects of life like the dress code where some women are being discriminated. On the same note, I would like to add that equality in women and humanity at large cannot be achieved if we lay focus on one aspect and forget others. For instance, nobody should be paid poorly because of their color, gender, sexual orientation, among other elements of intersectionality.

Hey!

I really loved reading your article on intersectional feminism and how it is needed today. One thing to point out is I think you should do a little more reading on how to create wiki pages and add better headings to your page. It makes it easier for readers to see what they are reading about and also makes it look better. Also try to stay away from adding too much of your opinion in the page and focus more on the informational part of it.

Hello,

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your wiki page on intersectional feminism vs. white feminism and found your page to be quite informational and insightful. One thing that I do believe will make your page a little better and more presentable is if you add headers to each paragraph or mini titles. I feel that this not only will let readers know what each paragraph is about and are able to sort out the information while reading but it also gives your wiki pages more of a finished and professional look to it. There are many great website sources that show you how to use wiki and what design features they contain which helps out a lot!

Hey!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your post, and believe you have a good base to build on! One positive thing I believe you did was provide relevant examples with concise analysis. Two things I believe you could improve on were first as mentioned beforehand providing headers with clear topics to ease the reading experience, and second possibly combining the first two paragraphs as it is slightly redundant to define the topic twice.

Good start!

Hello, I enjoyed reading your post. This topic is very interesting and closely connected to our GRSJ 224A course about intersectionality. There is definitely many evident examples of intersectionality upon women in society today. Moreover, intersectionality on race is very evident as well. Not only are females perceived and stigmatized as the more vulnerable, submissive, and inferior gender, race can also negatively affect an individual even more. It is great that there is a movement that aims to publically exploit the discriminations that are placed upon individuals, based on their gender and race.

I would definitely recommend you to create an introduction summary of intersectionality feminism and to further separate your writing into subcategories or sections. That way, it will make the page easier to read and follow along. It would also allow readers to know what the subsection topics are for this wiki page, prior to reading the entire wiki page. From what you have written so far, I would suggest creating subcategories for Double-Standard (include the wage gap and how that ties into not only gender but race), Intersectionality Feminism vs. White Feminism, Criteria to become an Intersectional Feminism, The Effects of the Movement. Nonetheless, great start!

Hey!

I think overall the topic and information looks good. I think however, you can provide a short biography of the people you mention in the article. For example, who is Kimberle Crenshaw? For people who don't know anything about intersectional feminism, it is hard to understand the significance of her. So maybe add something about how she's a lawyer/ professor, so we can understand why she has so much pull in this area and how she was able to start a movement. As well, a small background of Laci Green and Franchesca Ramsey would be helpful too. Were they put into any situations where intersectional feminism was needed? I think this would really help as it can help us understand why these girls' advice are trustworthy.

And Isabelle noted below, it would really help to organize the topic under different headings!

Tavy Wu

The topic you chose is an very interesting and informative, while also very relevant to the course. Just a suggestion on formatting, splitting up your sections into concise sections with larger headings might be helpful for the overall flow of your page and makes for a little more clear presentation of your ideas/topics. There is a help page that explains exactly how to do this, which I found very helpful. Additionally, providing wiki links to concepts, in your case such as the wage gap, or anything you think the reader might want to know more about/get a more detailed explanation on, are helpful as well. Hope these suggestions are helpful!

Hi Jenessa,

Your topic really caught my eye, which is why I clicked on your page to give some comments! I thought that how you placed the word intersectionality really gave context to how you wanted to talk about the issue. The history you gave behind the word definetly gives it more meaning and gives people further insight into where the word came from and how it should be understood. Be careful of how you are using the word ie "intersectionality" vs "intersectional" etc... There were a couple spots where I think the word should have been used in a different conjugate. Overall, I think the introduction and topic was introduced well. One thing to consider would be other factors or issues that are influenced by intersectionality like access to contraceptives, access to healthcare, education, or political power. I think it would be great to include more of these topics besides the gender wage gap, since you do argue that the word intersectionality should be better understood because it affects so many different pillars of life. Consequently, if you do wish to only focus on the gender wage gap, I would consider renaming your Wiki Page to something that better reflects your topic. I think your conclusions was strong and helps brings everything and your personal analysis together! I read it almost as a call to action, which I think can have a powerful impact on your readers. I would just be careful of differentiating between personal opinion versus analysis based on your research.

Good Luck with the rest of your project :)

Mattea

Hey! This is a very interesting Wiki page extremely connected to our GRSJ course, which is great. I like how you used names and examples of feminists and the wage gap, this makes it easy to relate the page to real life struggles. A few formatting suggestions I have for you might make your Page more organized. Make sure to use headings, such as Introduction or Summary, Background, Examples, Conclusion etc. I had a tricky time trying to format my page, but once you are on your Wiki page, click “Edit” in the top right corner. Then you will find a tool bar in the Middle Top area of the page and there will be a ‘Help’ tab you can click on. Although it’s tedious it’s helpful. -Isabelle Durrans - 70727284